The Top 8 Scientific
Principles of Fitness

8> One cannot exceed the speed of Lite, especially Lite with Olestra.

7> For every exercise, there is an equal and opposite injury.

6> You can be certain about the treadmill’s speed, or about how long you will be able to continue jogging, but not both.

5> Om’s Law: Resistance to meditation is proportional to the charge for taking the class.

4> Corollary to Om’s Law: The effectiveness of meditation i

directly proportional to the silliness of the mantra.

3> What goes up-two-three must come down-two-three….

2> A gram-equivalent of guaca-mole equals 6.022*10^23 calories

(Avocado’s Number)

and the Number 1 Scientific Principle of Fitness…

1> A body at rest tends to stay at rest until your alarm goes off at FOUR IN THE FRICKEN MORNING so you can go jogging, jeez, think of the person sleeping next to you sometimes, willya?

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Credits:

Selected from 38 submissions from 11 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Matt Van Opens, Kenosha. WI — 1
William Prune Wickart, Danish Falls, MN — 2, 7
Gideon Griebenow, Potchefstroom, South Africa — 3, 6
Larry Baum, Hong Kong — 4, 8
Nancy Vaine, Fairfield, CT — 5
Stephen Lister, Brisbane, Australia — 7
Erdos Gauss, Faraday, MA — Banner Tag, RU, HM li
Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL — List Moderator/Govern