NOTE FROM FRAN:

Dietitians and nutritionists have
identified some promising ways to help
adolescents make healthier food choices.
Among the team’s findings, healthy
“household eating rules” were among
the most important factors.
Rules, you say? Teens need rules?
We’ll give ‘em rules.

The Top 9 Rules for
Healthy Family Eating

9> Green vegetables: good. Green meats: bad.

8> Ketchup is not a vegetable. Gummy worms are not meat. A margarita is not fruit.

7> A balanced diet is important: Eat all the colors of M&Ms, not just the green ones.

6> Pickles are a vegetable; the bumps are not light-saber controls.

5> Thou shalt not invent new food groups — even when we’re having goulash.

4> Avoid foods with TV ads featuring clowns, cartoon characters, girls in bikinis or legal disclaimers.

3> Keep daily stats to see who ate most nutritiously. Winner gets a Wasa cracker and a banana.

2> If you’re making sandwiches and run out of bread, Eggo waffles are not an acceptable healthy substitute unless they have blueberries.

and the Number 1 Rule for Healthy Family Eating…

1> Timmy doesn’t have to eat spinach until his braces come off.

.

Credits:

Selected from 32 submissions from 9 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Bruce Kane, Bentonville AR — 1
Matt Van Opens, Kenosha. WI — 2, 7
Judith Cottrill, Bronx, NY — 3
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 4
William Prune Wickart, Danish Falls, MN — 5, 6
Kevin van Houten, The Colony, TX — 8, 9
Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL — List Moderator/Governing Body