December 14, 2004     

The Top 8 Requests
Sent to Healthy Santa

8> A four-month spiritual sojourn in India. Failing that, a
three-week spa treatment in New Mexico. Or failing that, just
get me the hell out of Alabama!

7> Please do not let your reindeer do aerobic elfercize to the
oldies on my roof at three in the morning.

6> I promise to be good all year if you’ll only bring me some low
fat, carb-free french fries.

5> I’m really sorry about asking for all those free weights last
year. I hope your back has healed.

4> A treadmill with a setting for “schlep.”

3> All I want for Christmas is my two front abs!

2> Congrats on your Iditarod win. Where did you get those funny-
looking dogs?

and the Number 1 Request Sent to Healthy Santa…

1> “All right, already, I’m setting out bran muffins and soy milk
this year. *Now* can I get my frickin’ pony?!?”

.

Credits:

Selected from 49 submissions from 10 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Scott Elmer, Wheaton, IL — 1
Guy Payne, Birmingham, AL — 1, 3, 4, 8 (Hat trick!)
Matt Van Opens, Kenosha. WI — 1
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 2, 5, 6, 7 (Hat trick!)
Judy McAbee, Temple, TX — Banner Tag, RU list name
Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL — List Moderator/Governing Body