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July 8, 2004      Share

A couple of days ago, while shopping for something
to lounge near a pool in, I spotted a 50-foot
banner. It read “Back to School.” What possible
reason, in early July, could this store have to
create such a sick artifact?

The Top 5 Reasons “Back to
School” Sales Have Already Started

5> Must sell those Jennifer Lopez/Marc Anthony lunch boxes before
they become obsolete.

4> Parents need SOMETHING to give them hope between the Fourth of
July and Labor Day.

3> The big July 1 Canada Day sales are finally over.

2> It takes time to select just the right Number 2 pencil to go
with your school outfits.

and the Number 1 Reason “Back to School” Sales Have Already
1> Christmas clearance sales are due to start August 14.



Selected from 15 submissions from 5 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA — 1, 2, 3 (Hat trick!)
Gary Tunstall, Houston, TX — 1, 5
Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green OH — 1, 2
Janis Spidle, Kansas City, MO — 2, 4
Andrea Crain, Madison, WI — Guidance Counselor