October 12th, 2007



NOTE FROM JILL:
OJ, oh OJ! Back in the slammer again.
And he might be there for life.
How will our dear Orenthal stay lovely?


The Top 7 Beauty Tips for Prisoners


7> Trade cigarettes for black market Mary Kay products.

6> The hair of the rats in your cell can be used to extend your lashes.

5> A non-comedogenic foundation does wonders for hiding those unsightly shanking scars.

4> Gonna choke a bitch in the prison yard during rec time? Not before a mani-pedi mister!

3> Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Then he does the same with you.

2> Use Solitary Confinement Cell Block Grout Mask to exfoliate, revitalize and add a glow to skin that never, ever sees the sun.

and the Number 1 Beauty Tip for Prisoners…

1> Shaving and flossing are essential to help you look and feel your best when it’s your turn in the glory hole rotation.




.

Credits:

Selected from 19 submissions from 8 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Todd Squire, Seattle, WA — 1, 4, 5 (Hat trick!)
Beth Wehner, Fort Drum, NY — 2, 7
Mark Zinck, Grand Rapids, MI — 3
Matt Van Opens, Kenosha. WI — 6
Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA — Beauty Queen