September 2, 2004     

The Top 9 Signs Mom Was Having a
Bad Day When She Packed Your Lunch

9> All the chocolate has been licked off your fun-sized Snickers
bar.

8> Lutefisk. ‘Nuff said.

7> PB&J — check.
Yogurt — check.
Carrot sticks — check.
Mom’s bottle of Prozac — uh-oh.

6> It consists of a sandwich, carrot sticks, apple, Twinkie and
the still-beating heart of the incompetent plumber she
hired.

5> “Anyone want to trade for some of my sister’s dirty
underwear?”

4> Dad got my lunch: PB&J, Doritos, chocolate milk.
I got Dad’s lunch: Bloody kitchen knife and a note sa

“You’re next, you cheating bastard.”

3> The only thing in your lunchbox? A double handful of Red
Lobster free appetizer coupons.

2> All the heads are missing from your Teddy Grahams.

and the Number 1 Sign Mom Was Having a Bad Day When She Packed
Your Lunch…

1> One packed lunch, three kids, winner takes all.

.

Credits:

Selected from 85 submissions from 28 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Mark Sweatt, Marietta, GA — 1
Christa Grunewald, Manhattan, KS — 2
Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL — 3, HM list name
Johan Dartarus, Chapel Hill, NC — 4
Jim Bannon, Simian Hill, MD — 5
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 6, 9
Ken Stone, San Jose, CA — 7
Steve Lunetta, Tucson, AZ — 8
Michael Mierow, Milwaukee, WI — 8
Sue Raskin, Palm Harbor, FL — RU list name
Kim Walker-Daniels, Sun Prairie, WI — Wearer of the Big White Hat