NOTE FROM DAVE:

Not every secret identity is as cool as a millionaire playboy,
crusading journalist or scientist. Some heroes may be disguised
as a bartender, the washing machine repairman, or perhaps your
personal trainer — now wouldn’t *that* explain a few things!

The Top 9 Signs Your
Personal Trainer is a Super Hero

9> Claims deep knee bends also help in apprehending evil midget masterminds.

8> His workout suit appears to be made out of molded rubber with nipples on the chest.

7> When you’re doing squat thrusts he keeps offering to “fly you to the moon.” At least, I *hope* that means he’s a superhero.

6> There’s lettuce everywhere! Cheese and bologna… wait, wrong kind of hero.

5> Swimming 50 laps around Australia seems like a bit much.

4> While you’re doing bench presses on the Nautilus, he’s bench-pressing the Nautilus.

3> Seconds after telling you to “feel the burn,” he bursts into flame.

2> “Okay, today’s jogging route is going to take us up the fire escape, then across several rooftops, where we will swing down from the flagpole on the side of the public library onto the top of the 10:13 crosstown bus…”

and the Number 1 Sign Your Personal Trainer is a Super Hero…

1> She ain’t kidding — those really *are* buns of steel.

.

Credits:

Selected from 48 submissions from 18 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Paul Boyle, Metropolis, IL — 1, 3 (Woo-hoo! 1st #1)
Neil Davidson, Mississauga, ON — 2, 8
Kevin Paul Wickart, Normal, IL — 4, 7
Mark Zinck, Grand Rapids, MI — 5, 6
Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL — 9
Dave Goudsward, Harrisburg, PA — Mild-Mannered Reporter