NOTE FROM DAVE:

Not everyone gets the super strength, flight or
invulnerable hide. In fact, some abilities beyond
those of mortal men are just not impressive…

The Top 9 Least Useful Super Powers

9> The ability to control Dodo birds to do your evil bidding.

8> The ability to breathe in butter.

7> Three words: Prehensile Nose Hair

6> “This is to inform you that a Cease and Desist Order has been filed against this list on behalf of our client Arthur Curry, also known as Aquaman, on the grounds that its subject matter can be construed as a direct insult with intent to cause public ridicule.”

5> The uncanny ability to see through salt water taffy.

4> The ability to look about 15 lbs. overweight in spandex.

3> Able to leap really tall people in a single day.

2> The power to cloud your own mind.

and the Number 1 Least Useful Super Power…

1> Strength to squeeze coal into… well, smaller chunks of coal.

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Credits:

Selected from 62 submissions from 14 contributors,
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Reid Kerr, Carthage, TX — 1 (2nd #1)
Kevin Paul Wickart, Normal, IL — 2, 6
Erin Blair, Kenmore NY — 3
Brian Pierce, Lynnwood, WA — 4
Jim Manchester, Huntsville, AL — 5, 7
Neil Davidson, Mississauga, ON — 8
Arthur Levesque, Laurel, MD — 9
Dave Goudsward, Harrisburg, PA — Mild-Mannered Reporter