NOTE FROM CHRIS:

List editor Laurie Northrup has gone on a spring break
community service trip to rural South Carolina. Since she’s
clearly having a rockin’ good time, we here at the Top5
College list wondered how *your* spring break was going…

The Top 9 Signs
Your Spring Break Sucks

9> Sitting there in the barren Texas desert, the travel agency’s “Paris Travel Package” no longer seems too good to be true.

8> Try as you might, you just can’t get your AA-cup self on “Girls Gone Wild.”

7> Trunkful of beer and booze? Check. Vintage 70s bong? Check. String bikini? Check. Condoms? Check. Ride lined up to Salt Lake City? Uh-oh!

6> You and your posse are raisin’ da roof!! — for the Boise, Idaho, chapter of Habitat for Humanity.

5> Your classmates: Visiting every bar in Ft. Lauderdale, then swimming naked in the ocean. You: Getting drunk in a bathtub.

4> The only MTV babe in sight? Daria.

3> Next spring you’ll pay more attention in Geography lecture before booking your flights — remember, it’s SKI Stowe, SURF Waikiki.

2> You can’t remember where you went, who you slept with, or why you got that tattoo of Barry Manilow on your ass.

and the Number 1 Sign Your Spring Break Sucks…

1> The only silicon you managed to get your hands on were the grains of sand stuck in your Speedo.

.

Credits:

Selected from 23 submissions by 10 contributors.
Today’s Little Fiver authors are:

Scott Sistek, University of Washington, Seattle - 1 (Woo-hoo!)
Madeleine Sato, Kirkland College - 2, List Moderator
Mike Budzinski, Purdue University - 2
Julie K. Stahlhut, Western Michigan University - 3, 7
Wade Kwon, Cornell University - 4, 6
Nikita Heroux, Hartwick College - 5
Kristopher Kettner, Columbia College - 8
Ed Smith, UT Chattanooga - 9
Gail Celio, University of Georgia - Topic
Laurie Northrup, Hamilton College - Resident Advisor