April 4, 2008
acknowledged the chance of an emergency
call going unanswered due to all
dispatchers being on other calls… probably
answering calls from College students.
in a Collegiate “911″ Call
7> “Hi, it’s Brad at the frat house again. The usual, alcohol
poisoning. No, not everyone, only twelve or thirteen this
time. Okay, see you in five minutes.”
6> “Any idea if this guarantees me straight A’s?”
5> “Umm, when you get here, you’ll see he also must have
accidentally stuck his face into some open black magic
markers.”
4> “I didn’t think he’d actually *try* drinking 10 liters in 2
hours to break my made-up record.”
3> “Dude, I will send you a half pound of Extra Kind if you can
send the Fire Department and the Ambulance but not the
Fuzz.”
2> “How many marshmallows can the human rectum safely take?”
immediately to help you relieve your life threatening case of
the ‘munchies,’ and he’ll even bring his dog, Sniffy.”
Selected from 27 submissions from 9 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
James Knowles, Cal Poly — 1
Michele Lord, U of NE Lincoln — 2, 7
Gary Reynolds, Indiana University — 3
G. Griebenow, Potchefstroom University — 4
Randy Lee, West Point — 5
Mark Sweatt, Student Emeritus, Atlanta — 6
Brandon Eldridge, StL College of Pharmacy — Dean of Students
in the girl’s dorm needing total evacuation. Yes, I know it’s 3AM.
No, I’m not making this up.”
(Jeff Rabinowitz, Temple University)
“If you send an ambulance, can you get that really hot EMT to give
me mouth-to-mouth?”
(Jim Phynn, Georgetown University)
“Since I am with him, can you write me an excuse from my Econ
exam?”
(Mark Sweatt, Student Emeritus, Atlanta)
“Yes, I said 84 goldfish. Now, will you please send the
paramedics?”
(Jeff Rabinowitz, Temple University)
Runners Up list name
(Randy Lee, West Point)